Tomorrow is covid isolation day

 Hi, it’s me again, soulful sunflower here. Tomorrow is the day I go in for covid testing as they require 6 days of covid isolation. Luckily I am still able to get 99% of my job done from home under these circumstances. 


Today I wanted to write about reflecting. I feel like sharing what has happened a bit since my mom passed away what will be 7 years on thanksgiving 2020. I was 27, not married, didn’t have much passion in my life, and well, I went down a dark path. I felt like things in my immediate family weren’t handled appropriately (don’t worry thin gs have since then been worked on) but the point of this, is we all go through seasons. When my mom passed, my season was dark. I didn’t connect well with others, I lost my spark, I just didn’t care about anything. My relationships were suffering, I was suffering and I couldn’t see the light. Fast forward to leaving Chicago and moving back to Colorado to start a new journey in nutrition. I stopped crying myself to sleep, I stopped playing a victim as if I was the only one who lost a parent/soulmate. I found nutrition as I dig deep down inside myself to see if this was the light that could turn things around for me. I didn’t want to be sad, I didn’t want to be angry, I just didn’t know how to change my attitude. Well here we are 7 years later. And the change in my attitude is leaps and bounds. The point of this, is to talk about relationships. There are some people that knew my mom and care along on my journey after she passed. It wasn’t right away, it was more of a building a foundation type of relationship. I truly was inspired by these people. They treated me like a daughter, they loved me like a daughter, and 7 years later they still feel as if I were one of their own. I just want to shout out how blessed and honored I am, because it’s not everyday people walk into your life and genuinely care about your well being. They only want to give and take nothing, but be part of your challenges and part of your blessings. They are there for you through the good and the ugly. Let me tell you, when I cry, I sure am ugly. LOL... that ugly cry tho..


Now I don’t want to discredit the seasons or the good and not so good people I have met along the way who are not part of my journey today, or the people whom I have lost touch with but would like to offer some sort of support in my journey, but to highlight the people who have literally seen you at your worse, when you thought life was over you, and they helped you rise above, and now it’s my turn to go through what my mom did, even though it triggers my PTSD, is incredible. I want to be that person for someone. I, was not that strength for my mom, as I was so selfish losing her, I couldn’t be there enough for her- I was weak and just wanted this to be a bad nightmare. But now, I want to be that person. I am mentally strong enough to be there for someone through ALL stages of life. I want to be the Roxy’s in the world who see things with the glass half full, who offer advice even when they know we aren’t going to take it, who listens and loves unconditionally, if anyone needs a mentor or someone to chat with or just someone who will listen, please feel free to reach out, as I am ready to be more of that person for someone else. I have been blessed with a few constants in my life and second moms has been one of them ❤️


I leave you with this, if someone calls you and wants yo do a check in, be grateful they care enough, if someone sends you a thinking of you text, be soo full of gratitude because not everyone has the love and support they need to get through tough times. 


Today, for some reason I was the most anxious. My mind isn’t thinking about anything but my body is stressed out. I took many deep breaths, moments and pauses. I challenge you during a tough time to do the same. 


So much love to you ALL!


J

Soulful Sunflower🌻



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